My favorite version of the bible.

I just found my new favorite version of the Bible, Here

Hellbound :-)

I was at one of "those" conferences again. (tears and pain)
By "those" I mean the kind that try to prove God created the world, and the way they do this is by disproving evolution. The whole idea that you can prove one thing by disproving something else has always confused me just a little.
Normally when I have experienced this kind of conference, (I get really annoyed and try to get sick so I can leave) I have a hard time because the speakers themselves seem to be downright rude and so unempathetic. Their intentions seem to be good, but the way they go about it makes me never ever ever ever want to be like them. This is sad because ultimately they are trying communicate there is a God who loves them, and they suck at it. But this time it was different at first, The first speaker Ron Carlson (the video on this link has a ton of eastern religions mentioned in it) actually was really..... I don't know..... normal.....ish. ha. Granted this is the ONLY time I have ever heard him speak but, he seemed like a human who loves other humans anyways. I was surprised that I was able to learn something from him. Like how this graph is leading you to believe that based on the layers of rock you can figure out how old a fossil is. but check it, the layers of rock in no way have ever appeared in that order anywhere on the earth. I just thought that was cool and awkward. so yeah even while talking about people who have a different set of beliefs he was really respectful, I totally could learn from that.
BUT THEN......
speaker number 2 got up and this was exactly the kind of person I was expecting at this kind of conference. Really flamboyant, not in the good way, really rude, and ready to let you know all the problems with the world but 0 solutions. I composed a list while he was talking of all thing he thought were heretical, and was not very surprised to find that most of the things he mentioned were things that I practice in my Christian walk. for instance
-a Contemplative life style, because it has it's root's in eastern religion.
Meditation specifically, eastern religious practice
-working toward Social Justice. Because Social sounds like Socialism. I'm being completely
serious.
-Yoga, because you will start writing books that daemons dictate to you...... but more inportantly..... it comes from eastern Religions.
ladaladalada
-Listening to rob bell, I think it's because he has an E in his last name, and you do you know what phrase starts with an E???? Eastern religion.
there's more but I will spare you. (and I don't know if I'm ready to give away all my heretical practices yet.
There was this thread though with the problem being Eastern Religions. And this is the point of this whole post I guess. I really get a kick out of it when people in general talk about eastern religions in general like they are the worst thing on the face of the earth. I just want to remind them in a loving sort of Jesusy way that, Christianity has it's roots in an Eastern Religion. I guess were all going to Hell :-)

But at the end of His talk he got less angry and more level headed and said that ultimately his goal is to see more people including himself live and embody who Jesus is. Even though the way he goes about it is way different than the way I do it. I can appreciate that, and realize that he is just as needed in the body of Christ as I am. (so maybe not at all ha)

peace.

Grape Juice

I was reminded about a certain person who while I was growing up who told me that,
"Jesus didn't turn the water in to real wine, It was really just grape juice, Jesus wouldn't do that kind of thing because wine leads to evil acts."

So I thought I would correct the bible in several areas. Obviously whoever translated the bible didn't have this important wine/grape juice information.

Genesis 9:20,21 (HHB) (harry's heretical blogging) concerning Noah.

Noah, a man of the soil, proceeded to plant a vineyard. When he drank some of its grape juice, he became drunk and lay uncovered inside his tent.

Moral: no more grape juice while camping with the family, talk about awkward.

Leviticus 10:9
Concerning The priests
"You and your sons are not to drink Grape Juice whenever you go into the Tent of Meeting, or you will die. This is a lasting ordinance for the generations to come.

Moral: Oh crap I took communion last sunday

1st Samuel 1:17

and said to her, "How long will you keep on getting drunk? Get rid of your Grape Juice."

Obviousy this grape juice stuf is more potent than I originally thought.

And my personal Favorite

Song of Solomon 7:2

Your navel is a rounded goblet that never lacks blended Grape Juice. Your waist is a mound of wheat encircled by lilies.


ummmmmm

Well that's all for now, I dare you to find some better verses referring to the grape juice.